🤺"MAGA Family Feud" Edition

The MAGA coalition, normally unified in its mission to scream "BIDEN BAD" in unison, has entered its favorite new pastime: cannibalizing itself. This time, the trigger is Israel's bombardment of Iran—a foreign policy Rorschach test that's pitted the MAGA gods against each other in a battle of who loves "America First" more.

On one side: Tucker Carlson and Steve Bannon, waving their “no more forever wars” banners, telling Trump to ghost Netanyahu like a bad Tinder date. On the other side: Sean Hannity, Mark Levin, Lindsey Graham, and assorted neocon revivalists, practically salivating for bunker-busters and regime change, because what’s a little WWIII between friends?

Caught in the middle is Donald Trump, the human windsock. First, he opposed Israel’s attack. Then Netanyahu called. Now Trump is sort of supporting it, but also kind of not, but maybe will, depending on which Fox alumnus he watches before bedtime. As always, Trump’s guiding principle remains: whatever keeps the cameras on him and the checks coming in.

Even within MAGA world, it’s become a slap fight worthy of reality TV. Tucker accuses Levin of warmongering; Levin calls Tucker a propagandist who slobbers over “evil people” (pot, meet kettle). Marjorie Taylor Greene, America’s foremost expert in shouting nonsense into the void, weighed in to remind everyone that starting wars is “not America First”—which is rich, considering her usual policy expertise maxes out at Jewish space lasers.

Meanwhile, Trump declared from Air Force One that he’s not seeking a ceasefire but something “better than a ceasefire.” (Translation: he has no idea what he’s talking about, but it sounds strong.) He then dismissed his own intelligence community’s assessment of Iran’s nuclear program, instead choosing to take spiritual advice from Mike Huckabee, who assured him that God Himself spared Trump from assassination last year to fulfill his destiny as the possible next Truman, atomic bombs included. Comforting.

Of course, behind all the posturing, the military quietly moves warships and planes closer to Iran, just in case Trump feels particularly Trumanesque after his next Fox binge. After all, what’s global annihilation when you’re chosen by God?

In the end, one thing is clear: The MAGA movement may not know what “America First” means anymore, but it absolutely knows how to turn any crisis into a live-action WWE cage match for attention. Stay tuned.

Rob Rogers - Andrews McMeel

Jeff Danziger - Counterpoint

Jack Ohman - Tribune Content Agency

Nick Anderson - Tribune Content Agency

Walt Handelsman - Tribune Content Agency

Clay Bennett - Counterpoint Media

David Horsey - Tribune Content Agency

Drew Sheneman - Tribune Content Agency

Bill Bramhall - Tribune Content Agency

Pedro Molina - Counterpoint Media

Utah Senator Mike Lee, apparently mistaking double murders for open mic night at a CPAC roast, decided the Minnesota shootings were the perfect moment to debut his latest stand-up material: blaming Democrats, mocking Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz, and inventing Marxist boogeymen. Unsurprisingly, the audience—consisting of grieving families and horrified colleagues—didn’t laugh.

The Mormon Church-owned Deseret News, not usually known for harsh words toward Utah Republicans, took the extraordinary step of publicly dragging Lee for his grotesque lack of empathy, calling his social media diarrhea “unacceptable for anyone, let alone from a member of the Senate.” Translation: Mike, we expect a certain level of soullessness in politics, but you managed to overshoot it.

Democratic Senator Tina Smith—whose friend was murdered—confronted Lee in person to remind him that victims’ families tend to prefer condolences over political drive-bys. Lee reportedly stood there, apparently stunned to learn that his own-the libs trolling had real-world consequences beyond likes and retweets from anonymous basement dwellers.

Even some of Lee's fellow Republicans managed to locate a moral compass long enough to call him "insensitive" and "not even true." High praise from a party that usually considers cruelty part of the job description.

After being scolded by grieving colleagues, national media, and his own hometown newspaper, Lee finally deleted the posts—the political equivalent of shoving the bloody brass knuckles under the couch and hoping nobody notices. The Deseret News helpfully suggested that maybe an apology could follow, though expecting a shred of humanity from Lee at this point is probably wishful thinking.